Signs You Ate too Much on Thanksgiving
1. You spill more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses
2. Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy
3. Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian
4. The “Gravy Boat” your wife set out was a real 12′ boat !
5. The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland
6. You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down
7. Your “Big Elvis Super-Belt” won’t even go around your waist
8.* You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail
9. You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday
10. Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy
11. You have 5 TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games
12. A guest quotes a Biblical passage from “The Feeding of the 5000″
13. That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn
14. Your wife wears a life jacket at nite in your water bed
15. Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice
16. You consider gluttony as your patriotic duty
17. It looks like the left-overs are gonna last until Christmas
18. Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard & delete this
Comments
39 comments
Gluttony is a sin and you will pay with your health.
Jean it’s a damn joke LIGHTEN UP
THE LORD never said we couldn’t LAUGH AT OURSELVES!
funnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
@Jean
Jean why are you always so negative???
@ADMIN I am not ALWAYS neg, I like this site and have enjoyed it for a long time. Remember I am a yam? I have made a lot of fun remarks and got votes. Have you ever ask IDGARA why he is ALWAYS negative? I have never seen it. JEAN HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!!!
Jean there will always be someone that takes every thing serious don’t worry about them. Have a good time sumitting comments.
Its a joke. we can’t be serious all the time. if you can’t take a joke, there is a serious issue with you…. I enjoy these jokes on here. a person can’t be serious all the time. Live it up and laugh some…You will feel better… Have a great day everyone….
@Jean – it would be different if you would call IDGARA a SHE – coz that is what IDGARA is. A woman. DOH!!!??? There are some of these jokes on here that are tasteless but funny. Some are funny but dumb. Then there are some that alot of people JUST DON’T GET. Best thing to do is read it, think if this is fact or fiction, then judge. But judge with a laugh in your voice when you read it and remark about it.
Whoa!!!! A negative is still a valid answer/comment a personal preference is just that a personal pref. we cannot always be little Mary sunshine and please most of the people most of the time. A little salt and pepper on the comments adds a bit of spice into a mixture of peoples daily chit chat…..Thats why we have ‘comment boxes’ …… No!!!! I mean Yes!!!!!
Jean, you are lacking in the “sense of humor” department. If you feel so negative about these jokes, why are you reading them? Go to a more serious sight like the “daily word”.
It takes all kinds to make the world. Those who take things serious, those who like to laugh, and those who criticize others. Just enjoy what jokes you find funny, and say what you want. So far, we are not censured on comments. A free world is what we are supposed to have.Some jokes are truly funny, others not so, but still there to view. Smile, and give people the right to be what they are.
Whoa. To everyone who attacked Jean…Jean is not the only serious one. I don’t think it was as bad as everyone made it. Relax guys. It’s ok. lol
@SHA THANKS!!!
all my lovely turkey in trobleeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!
Its surprising to knw IDGARA is a “she” and seriously Admin u shd take a look at her previous comments, @ Jean…u said d truth
hi evryone. seems today is thebattle of the bulge, sorry, fingers. let me sit back and see who to attack first
@IDGARA There is a difference between a woman and a Lady.
@Jean, Wats d difference btwn a WOMAN nd A LADY?
@goldengirl Ladies know how to spell for one thing.
Do you why angels can fly? Because they take themselfs lightly. He who laughs, lasts.
I am truly surprised ADMIN made a remark to Jean–hey ADMIN–why didn’t you say something to Rosecocca20 when she was putting her CRAZY stuff on here awhileback?–now she had a mental problem–even if she playing with our heads for awhile–she was definitely MENTAL!
sorry I meant to put “awhile back”
say Grace ….and enjoy what ever is on offer!!!!! its more about counting Your Blessing!!!!!! than calories!!!!!!
c’mon people it’s the holiday season get some holiday cheer! live, laugh, love, leave all the animosity’s behind, i am an old fart and bored as sin and i love this place so i can at least have something to smile about and all you negative people make it hard for other’s, i wish you all the very best of the season and love one another, peace be with you all….
You all sounds like a bunch of turkeys. ha.
Jean stated a true fact. Gluttony is a sin. You will
pay for over-eating with your health. SHE DID NOT
SAY ANYTHING NEGATIVE OR POSITIVE. SHE SIMPLY
STATED A FACT. Come on, guys, I think everyone got
a little negative here.
Now, let’s start this again:
Signs You Ate too Much on Thanksgiving
1. You spill more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses
2. Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy
3. Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian
4. The “Gravy Boat” your wife set out was a real 12? boat !
5. The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland
6. You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down
7. Your “Big Elvis Super-Belt” won’t even go around your waist
8.* You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail
9. You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday
10. Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy
11. You have 5 TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games
12. A guest quotes a Biblical passage from “The Feeding of the 5000?
13. That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn
14. Your wife wears a life jacket at nite in your water bed
15. Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice
16. You consider gluttony as your patriotic duty
17. It looks like the left-overs are gonna last until Christmas
18. Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard & delete this
@Margaret –that was good Margaret–lol!
I think I agree with ladybelle, we should please enjoy this site no matter the comment made by anybody, our characters can not always be the same…… Lets enjoy the wonderful day… lol
A couple of these made me smile.
I think you all forgot the meaning of Thanksgiving ! You all are ragging on each other about ‘porking out’ on Thanksgiving. I have no family in my State, it’s just me, my husband and two little rescue dogs. He wanted to watch football, the dogs wanted to lay around and I volunteered at our local food bank to fill serving trays with a great turkey meal and served our homeless Vets and our low income families. Everytime I would carry out 2 trays and serve these homeless vets who did everything they could back then to keep America the Land of the Free. I thanked them for their service and said “Enjoy your meal Soldier and Thank you”. One man had a tear in his eye. Now all you grumpies, stop it…think about the meaning of Thanksgiving and what are you thankfull for. I am thankful, even though I am disabled, that I was able to do something for those who gave so much to give me freedom and now live in poverty. That’s Thanksgiving!
I agree with you Lola Angel. Thanks you for helping a Veteran.
i agree with margaret and lola angel..however when u go to a family dinner, if u dont sample a little of everything, someones feelings will be hurt..so what do u do?
anyways, i never get a vote, but i wont hold it against the ones responsibile..i just enjoy the heck out of ppls comments..
come on everybody this is suppose to be funny site chin up smile and have a good day.
I agree with Maragret. And to Lola Angel I know God will truly bless you for sharing love this Thanksgiving. Gramms,I really don’t know why you haven’t got votes. I do like your comments and I just gave you a + vote. Sorry I did do it before sometimes I just forget to vote.
It looks like we all ate too much. When we over eat we just plain don’t feel good about ourselves. Let’s all shake the hand of a veteran and thank all of them for their service. They would think this list is funny. After all they have been through they deserve a good belly laugh…….kinda like mine jiggles when I laugh… GOD BLESS THE USA.
Sue- perhaps the Admin blocked Rosecocca20? But then that wouldn’t do much good cause she could easily go under a different name & email address. Oh well–hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving
Jeez, why is everyone ganging up on Jean? Shes not always negative. I have read a lot of her comments and they are NOT ALL NEGATIVE. Have some thanksgiving spirit, peeps.
Oh gosh, I missed out on a juicy commentary.