Blonde Easter
Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first blonde, “What is Easter?”
The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy! It’s the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful…”
“Wrong!” replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, “What is Easter?”
The second blonde replies, “Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus.”
St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she’s wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, “What is Easter?”
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, “I know what Easter is.”
“Oh?” says St. Peter, incredulously.
“Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder.”
St. Peter smiles broadly with delight. The third blonde continues, “Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter.”
Happy Easter!
Comments
46 comments
well that made me smile!!
funny, i think i like the third blonde answer
The second blonde is not sure but wanted to say something out of her mouth , but the first blonde eat turkey and rice and she did not know what she is eating for big fool.
I DON’T THINK JESUS APPRECIATE JOKES ABOUT HIM.
she think only abt Christmas b/c it importance for averyone but not as Easter
@ Mary….you’re wrong about Jesus. He loves a good joke even if it’s about him. His sense of humor has never been equaled in the history of mankind. He had so much love and took the joke very well even though the dubious honor of doing the punchline from beyond the crypt where the truely humorless ones thought to place him forever. Isn’t triumph over death the ultimate comeback joke?
@Mary
Q;If we are made in God’s image and if we as mortal humans hve a quite definitive sense of humor wouldt it follow obvooiusly then that our creator has an infinite sense of humor above and beyond anything we could ever think of.Just look at an octopus,for instance.
@Mary
Jesus loves humor,just look at the things God created, the octopus, Humans etc.
Jesus does love a good joke,but i don’t think this is very good.how about all those blondes out there do they like it.blondes are not as dumb as you would think i’m blonde and bet i’m a lot smarter than most of you you were all probab in slow learners class in school well i was honor roll student, and earning a good living sitting around listening to a buch of dumb asses like you.
millie, i think the joke is on you! and definitely not in you…it was a good clean joke and my daughter who is blonde, and graduated magna cum laude in the field of criminal justice sends me blonde jokes all the time and i send them to her…we think it is mainly funny because she is soo smart… and when she does do something dumb as we all do from time to time…she just says well i’m living up to my reputation as a blonde..and we laugh and enjoy the moment…by the way, the dumb ass comment sounded pretty blonde to me, rofl…sorry, but it was a dumb thing to say,
hugs millie…lighten up…
The stereotype of the dumb blond has been long standing joke in many movies and jokes over the decades. It comes out pretty equal when one looks at the big picture…..Funny joke …..I never thought a ghost could cast a shadow ….lol
Millie, not stereotyping blondes or anyone else (mainly because my wife is a blonde), but I will use stereotypes in a joke to point out the incongruity of it all. She has worked as a med secretary for 35 yr & we are talking mistakes that can kill. She is extremely organized & ‘on the ball’ at work. Once she leaves the job, it’s like she turns her brain off & I do ride her for some of it, but she is my ‘dumb blonde. Myself, just looking at me a person would think dumba*s redneck hick. I have found that if I let them continue to believe that, they will generally let their guard down. I may not qualify for Mensa, but I do have some college, am well-read, & believe in being prepared for anything. I cannot, due to physical size, readily identifiable abnormalities, & sheer presence, hide in a crowd but by altering my dress, & mannerisms, I can fit in at a black tie affair, an office, a work crew, a homeless convention, or any where else I find myself. My attitude is call me anything you want, but once you ‘write me off’ I GOT YOU!!!
Get some NEW MATERIAL!!!!!!
@sushi lover
SUSHI IT UP YOUR ASS
sushi lover please accept my sincere apology didn’t mean any harm just have to vent my anger on someone and u were there,and by the way spelling u were right spelling and punctuation were not my strong points.
and i love sushi too.
I agree with Mary. This is not funny!! I would NEVER make a joke about our Lord and Savor.
Found it to be funny. I must go now as I have to touch up my roots so I will look nice in Church Sunday. The Lord has a sense of humor so relax and enjoy the celebration of Easter. Bless
shut da f_u_ck up u mother_f_u_ck_er_s all of u r bull_sh_i_t and adsfljadskljfdsklj
@abigail- WOW! If you hate people and this site makes you feel like that, why do you read it?What made you so mad?
well that was a good story until she kept on talking-then she hung her self
HAPPY EASTER FOLKS!
well to be true……..
I dont practice the catholic religion… nor do I really practice any but I dont have anything against anyone that does. BUT!!!!! (and there always is a BUT!) I am very blonde and my last name well…….
;o)
so anyways……..people get there panties in a wad for no apparent reason… loosen up for cryin out loud! believe what you please and do as you please as long as you dont hurt others.
treat others as you would expect to be treated…. ;o) regaurdless of who or what you believe.
when someone does something good for you…..pass it forward…;o) (even if you have no clue who did it for you)
Im seriously not sure that JESUS is reading…. LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!
blondi
Well I’m sure that Jesus has a sense of humor but either way I read it it’s still a stupid joke. New material needed. Surely there is no blonde that stupid.
I am so joyfull that my God has a sense of humor I do feel he would laugh
It’s true that God has a sense of humor, just observe nature for a while and you will see. Dumb blonde jokes are belittling a group of people and God doesn’t approve. He also does not approve of using mass media to vent anger, bitterness, etc. And such vile language you find these days–it is not normal. I can tell it is just a sort of defense mechanism against the things people can’t, or won’t understand. The answer to that is read the Bible, attend a Bible Study, pray, attend church services and learn what the Lord would have you understand. I for one do not like to be stupid and I will avail myself of the knowledge God affords me in the above-mentioned avenues. Praise the Lord for His goodness to us, though it is undeserved.
If you are all but happy *’that is all we want of life
forget jokes and bad language
Happy Easter to all and everyone
Yarra Valley greets you*
Ok….if someone in your family was killed because of
some terrible person’s wrong-doing, would you want
it to be “made light of” as it was here JUST BECAUSE
YOUR FAMILY MEMBER HAD A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR
WHILE ALIVE? The price Jesus paid for our sins should
NEVER be part of a joke. MARY, you are right! People
always justify sin. I think maybe you know HIM personally while others just know about HIM.
This joke is not about Jesus Christ
this joke is about Blondes
and it goes already for many years how stupid blondes are,
I am blond since I was a little girl
but I can handle life even so my Husband died on me,
leave blondes alone , and we would not get so many funny and sometimes rude jokes
find another dummy
Happy Easter from australia,,
not all what looks good is Gold,,
I used to think of Easter as a Celebration, part Revelation!!! Lots of goodies and Chocolate to eat but on here its more about the “Nuts”!!!! Getting their Panties in a Twist!!!
“Lighten Up”!!!! and Enjoy or Celebrate,… Give Thanks to “Jesus” for his Sacrifice, as in the way you feel that it is an essential part of your Own Lives….
Its called “Freedom of Choice” !!!!! Jesus had his taken away… So we may be able to Exorcise Ours!!!!……. “Freedom of Choice”……..
Thank you meza
have a happy easter,
and Freedom of Choice,,
Jesus is not a “whatever makes YOU feel good” thing.
He is a HOLY GOD. Ya know, I just don’t think He would
make jokes about blonde-headed people and make them
the “butt” of His jokes. You say NUTS have their PANTIES in a WAD? It’s called CONVICTION.
BY TH
Jesus is not a “whatever makes YOU feel good” thing.
He is a HOLY GOD. Ya know, I just don’t think He would
make jokes about blonde-headed people and make them
the “butt” of His jokes. You say NUTS have their PANTIES in a WAD? It’s called CONVICTION.
BY THE WAY, JESUS DID NOT HAVE HIS TAKEN AWAY,
HE GAVE IT AWAY….FOR SINS LIKE THESE.
I know, I know, you all think we’ve made too much of
this. You probably think “little white lies” are okay, too.
They’re not. Time for me to move on. Final word:
FREEDOM OF CHOICE doesn’t make it right, at least that’s what I just read in the Scriptures.
As for ABIGAIL: What is your mother’s phone number?
I think I need to call her, young lady.
I think God does have a sense of humour the bible even says a merry heart does good llike medicine..and many other references.. to us lauging laughter is so good for us.
the jokes was about blondes and im blonde and I dont care.. lol lighten up people .. lol
THANK GOD THERE IS A JUDGMENT DAY WHEN EVIL LIKE THIS PERSONAL SLAM WILL BE REWARDED….AND JESUS WILL BE THE JUDGE!!!
What is up with all the prejudice? I think this joke is really lame and I’m in 5th grade and I’m a blonde that just happens to be in all honors classes thank you very much!!!
i dont think that is funny all the way around..making fun of blondes is not the right thing to do…lot of them are bleach..so what makes them then…as far jesus is concern i dont think any jokes of any kind makes it funny..it sad how people can make jokes like that..and think it funny..
I WANT TO WISH EVERBODY A HAPPY EASTER..
Do not worry your pretty head about silly jokes
the joke is most on them , because they done know any better ‘you just be happy
have a nice easter,
if you dont have to ,
dont go shopping on Saturday , its pandemonium in the shops , easter was not meant to be shopping only
take care,,H.S.
Y’know, I did find this joke cute.
I’m blond and I still think it’s funny. Besides, Who cares if that’s the stereotype? You’re friends won’t care or call you stupid.. not your true friends, at least.
So what if blondes are the butt of the joke? Red heads are known for being angry, but are they ALL that way? No.
The same thing goes for blondes.
Calm down, people(:
If you want to know if Jesus has/had a sense of humor I direct you to the book The man nobody knows by Bruce Barton. The theme of Mr. Barton’s book is that Jesus did indeed have a sense of humor some of which Christians have read over the years and never thought it was humorous.
man this joke is still circling around?
Okay everyone I read all your comments, and would like to say a few words here. I’m Roman Catholic, very strong in my faith, and have studied theology, psychology, and philosophy. My major was psychology. As research has it, and not so long ago, I read an e-mail that I received from a colleague of mine. First of all, in all my years of studying theology, one thing I recently learned (and here is a true story, that Jesus in most of the pictures we see of Him never smiled. Not true…Jesus smiled many times but the pictures were few and far between, I wish I could put those pictures on here so you can see.) Jesus did laugh, perhaps not at the jokes that we read about today, but I believe that He did and still does have a sense of humor. I also believe that we personally didn’t think up these jokes whether we’re blondes or not, if it happens that a joke is made (and in all due respect to Jesus and all blondes out there, it was because HE put the thought in our heads. Most of us aren’t intelligent enough to think of these jokes about Him.) Remember, life is tough at times, and we have to find a way to survive by joking about the stress in our lives, because if you don’t you would be depressed all the time. Jesus is the one that gives us some thoughts to think about. I pray novena prayers (which take 1 1/2 hrs to 1 hr and 45 minutes daily). Novena prayers are very powerful and mine to Jesus are extremely powerful. I’m a redhead, and I’ve had many jokes said about me, being hot tempered, watch out for her, etc., etc. I take it as a grain of salt, but if you stop and think about it, most blondes are pretty intellectual, and because everyone can’t be blonde or red headed, we are the blunt of the jokes. But please all you blondes out there and you red heads, don’t get mad, take it like a grain of salt and have a quick comeback with an answer. Show that you are more intellectual then some of the postings on here.
Jesus, has given us all brains. It’s how we use then. And I learned from one of my novena’s from St. Padre Pio, (the saintly man, that suffered for years with the stigmata of Jesus, that in the last prayer that I read, it says: “Jesus needs to be prayed for as well.” Very compelling statement, something to think about. Our Lord doesn’t want us to be sad, unhappy, or suffering…none of us can ever suffer or would suffer the way He did for any stranger. None of us are God, and He suffered and died for us. But if you stop and think about it, one of the blondes stated above about Christmas and when we celebrate the birth of Christ. Well we do that each year, as well as at Easter we celebrate the Resurrection of Christ. Tell me what the difference is? All people are beautiful in my eyes, and what did Christ do on the cross? He forgave the two criminals on either side of Him hanging on the cross, and said He would meet them in Heaven. What an honor for them meeting Our Beloved Savior in Heaven. Perhaps He was trying to comfort them, even while He was suffering and dying Himself. God made everyone equal, just looking different. What if we were all blondes in the world? Would we still be angry at jokes presented about us? Of course we would. We always find something apparently to fight and argue about, no matter what race, color or creed.
Yes, God does love a good joke. He has played many a joke on me, and I talk to Him about it. Sometimes I tell my friends and we get a good laugh.
What troubled me the most was not was said in the blond joke theory today but the nasty, ugly, remarks that were stated here. That bothered me more than anything then the joke itself. God forgives, He is a loving God, and does try to make us smile, even at His own expense. NO disrespect to you my beloved Savior, just trying to lighten the mood here.
Okay, I said my “Epistle” for the day. Please try to find it in your hearts to forgive what was said on here. After all, God forgave us for more important and horrendous words and actions that were said way before today’s comments. I pray for all my enemies, and I have forgiven those of you that made nasty remarks about blondes, redheads, and last but certainly not least, about Our Lord who suffered and died for us so we may someday meet Him in heaven as those criminals that died on the cross beside Him. May each of you have a Happy, Holy, Blessed Easter. Amen
The whiter my hair gets, the more I relate to dumb blonde idelogy.