Christmas Shopping
A husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says, “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” The husband says, “What?” The wife explains that he must be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman. The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen that night and he might as well deal with it.
So the next day the husband takes her Christmas shopping at a big department store. He walks around and has her try on three very expensive outfits.
She can’t decide. He tells his wife to take all three of them. Then they go over and get matching shoes worth $200 each. And then they go to the Jewellery Department where she gets a set of diamond earrings. The wife is so excited. She thinks her husband has flipped out, but she doesn’t care.
She goes for the tennis bracelet. The husband says, “But you don’t even play tennis! Well, okay if you like it then let’s get it. You deserve the best for Christmas.”
The wife is jumping up and down so excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says, “I am ready to go, let’s go to the cash register.” The husband stops and says, “No, honey I don’t feel like buying all this stuff now.” The wife’s face goes blank. “No honey, I just want you to hold this stuff for a while.”
The look on her face is indescribable and she is about to explode and the husband says, “You must be in tune with my financial needs as a man.”
November 30, 2010 @ 2:32 am
The difference here is: the woman was making out
but had limitations for what she wanted. SHE DID NOT
PLAN THIS EVENT ALL DAY IN ORDER TO HURT HER
HUSBAND!
The man, on the other hand, PLANNED IT ALL.
Besides, I hate shopping and don’t wear jewelry. He
would have had to come up with a better PLAN than
that “to get even” with me.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS OBSESSED WITH THEIR GENITALS.
December 28, 2009 @ 10:56 am
no Bubbles it’s not funny, mostly because you’re a woman, but also because it’s too much like real life….however in real life the man would be getting divorced if he wasn’t shot first lol
December 23, 2009 @ 11:59 pm
simply not funny
December 5, 2009 @ 11:17 am
do unto others what you want them to do unto you.
but i think the man went a little too far.
December 4, 2009 @ 6:51 pm
this joke was too predictable. i already knew how it was going to end when i read the first sentence.
December 4, 2009 @ 12:29 pm
Is this not tit for tat?I guess we should not embrace it.
December 3, 2009 @ 4:25 pm
I have seen this one on here before!
December 3, 2009 @ 3:49 pm
I’m a woman, and I can kinda agree with Gilles. The woman asked for all of that, because you don’t tease a man, especially someone you share a bed with seriously, and then say “No. I don’t feel like it.” That’s just wrong and rude.
December 3, 2009 @ 7:55 am
this is quite embarrasing,the man went too far !!!
December 2, 2009 @ 7:10 pm
Feels so good just thinking someone could even possibly get away with this. Women can be such cockteasers sometimes. Don’t heat up the oven if you’re not going to bake anything.