Rectum Stretcher
While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge.
The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, “What’s the hurry? “
I replied, “I’m late for work.”
“Oh yeah,” said the cop, “what do you do?”
I responded, “I’m a rectum stretcher.”
The cop said “What is a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?”
I said, “Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it’s about 6 foot wide.”
The cop asked me, “What the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?”
I simply replied, “You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge…”
The ticket — $95 dollars.
The look on his face, PRICELESS
lin
January 9, 2012 @ 8:07 am
Well thru cops I’ve dealt with I think it a fun joke. A cop pulled me over for a small thing 3 blocks from the dr. I was taking my child to. He could see how sick he was, hardly concious. But we had to stay right there with him taking his sweet time instead of an scort to clinic and getting child in and then take care of business, he was an ass hole.
cindy
January 3, 2010 @ 8:26 pm
It had a little giggle to it , but I do take our Law Enforcement seriously,Well. in most town’s , just not mine .
Jean
November 12, 2009 @ 9:17 pm
@kim BITE ME!
kim
November 12, 2009 @ 7:07 pm
@G
i agree G its a joke yall gee its a card site hellooo . and its a cartoon cop oh wait thats what most real cops look like lol
kim
November 12, 2009 @ 7:01 pm
@kim
no way Kim he had to be going through milton west virginia lol
G
November 8, 2009 @ 4:29 pm
Anybody ever stop to think that this is just a fucking joke. Get over yourselves.
faith
October 29, 2009 @ 1:27 pm
there are assholes everywhere.
Debi
October 10, 2009 @ 7:25 pm
Good one!!!!!
Jean
October 9, 2009 @ 2:45 pm
@ROY THANK YOU!!!! @GILLESMT Of course I have a sense of humor. I am on this site aren’t I. LOL