Halloween Jokes

Q – What is a vampire’s least favorite meal?
A – Stake !!

Q – What do vampires enjoy most about baseball?
A – The bats (and the double-headers)

Q – What kind of toothpaste do vampires buy?
A – Ultra-Bite.

Q – What does a monster wear when it rains?
A – His ghoul-oshes.

Q – How did the monster predict his future?
A – With a horror-scope.

Q – What did the monster do when he lost his hand?
A – He went to a second hand store.

Q – Why wouldn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A – Because he didn’t have any guts.

Q – What are a spook’s two favorite rides at the fair?
A – The roller ghoster and the merry ghoul round.

Q – What is a vampires favorite holiday?
A – Fangsgiving.

Q – What four things do monsters enjoy eating on Halloween?
A – Ghoulash and I Scream with booberry pie and ghoul-aid.

Q – What two famous places did the monster visit while on his vacation?
A – The Vampire State Building and Count Rushmore.

Q – What is in the red blood cells of monsters?
A – Hemogoblin !!!

Q – What spook lives in the “hundred acre wood”?
A – Winnie the Boo
A – His bootiful ghoul-friend.

Q – Where do ghosts keep their cars?
A – In a mirage.

Q – What is the hardest thing to sell to a mummy?
A – Life Insurance.

Q – How do you keep a skeleton from laughing?
A – Take away his funny bone!

Q – What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A – Neck tarines

Q – Why didn’t the wraith win at poker?
A – He didn’t have a ghost of a chance.

Q – What performers do vampires enjoy the most at the circus?
A – The jugulars

Q – What do spooks call their Navy?
A – The ghost guard.

Q – What do you call a mummy who eats cookies in bed?
A – A crumby mummy!

Q – Why do Casper’s phone bills tend to be so high each month?
A – He is always calling ghost-to-ghost.

Q – Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
A – Because he had no body to take !

Have a Happy Halloween!