Funny Joke: Fast Surgeon

Sam and John were out cutting wood, when John cut his own arm off…

Sam remained calm, wrapped the arm in a plastic bag, then took the arm and John to a surgeon.

“You are in luck,” said the surgeon. “I am an expert at re-attaching limbs… ”

“Come back in four hours when I have completed the operation.”

So, Sam returned in four hours and the surgeon said, “I did it faster than I expected. John is down at the pub.”

Sam rushed down to the pub and was amazed to see John playing darts.

A few weeks later, Sam and John were cutting wood again, when John accidentally cut off his leg…

Sam put the leg in a plastic bag and took the leg and John back to the same surgeon.

“Legs are harder,” said the surgeon, “but I’ll see what I can do. Come back in six hours.”

Sam returned in six hours, and the surgeon said, “I finished early. John’s playing football.”

Sam went to the field, and to his surprise, found John kicking 50-yard torpedoes.

A few weeks later, Sam and John were cutting wood again, when John accidentally cut off his own head…

Sam put the head in a plastic bag, then took it and the rest of John to the surgeon, confident that the skillful surgeon would do the job.

“Gee, heads are really difficult to re-attach,” the surgeon muttered, “but I’ll see what I can do – come on back in 12 hours.”

Sam returned in 12 hours.

“How did it go Doc?” he asked.

“I’m sorry, John died,” the surgeon replied…

“He suffocated in the plastic bag!”

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