You Might Be a Redneck Jedi

You might be a Redneck Jedi if ....

You've ever said, "May the force be with y'all."

Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

You've ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.

At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer-colored.

The front of your land speeder has bantha horns.

You can describe the taste of Ewok.

Your yard has ever had an X-Wing up on blocks.

The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is them dad gum skeeters.

Wookies are offended by your B. O.

You've ever used The Force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

You've ever used The Force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.

Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son. Come on over to the dark side! It'll be a hoot."

You've ever used your R-2 unit's self-defense electroshock thingy to light your barbecue grill.

The hood of your land speeder is painted with a Confederate flag.

You think Han Solo would look better in a flannel than that sissy vest.

You've ever fantasized about Princess Leah in Daisy Duke shorts.

The doors of your X-wing are welded shut and you have to climb in through the window.

Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt feller had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

You ever fell in love with your sister.

You've ever accidentally referred to Darth Vader's evil empire as "them damn Yankees."

You've a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with a redwood deck.

You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels on the rocks during the cantina scene.

In your opinion, that Darth Vader feller "just ain't right."

Posted By: paisanoPitBull