Anniversary Gift

A husband was in big trouble coming up to his wedding anniversary. His high spending, forever nagging, wife told him "ok you small brained good for nothing ape, tomorrow is our anniversary and there better be something in the driveway for me that goes from zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat".

The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Saturday.